Monday, May 09, 2011

Safe Spaces

hello and happy monday, comrades! we are finally FINALLY seeing some sunshine here in steeltown, and it is supposed to last all damn week. i try not to be a weather complainer (actually, i try not to be a complainer at all, really) but i must admit even i was not immune to the bleak drearyness that happened last month. but thats not what i wanted to write about.
i recently discovered through the magic of facebook that one of my old friends from high school is a lesbian. i am also fairly certain that one of my other high school friends is also lesbian but isnt saying so on facebook. anyway, the reason i mention it here is, neither of these two were out in high school. meanwhile, my very nearest and dearest, the beloved and famous TREVOR did come out in high school, which had its pros and cons, and i was there for all of it. all of this got me thinking. i started wondering about these two girls and however many untold friends or acquaintances i made over the years who might have been struggling with their sexuality. high school is confusing for everyone, and i think gay teens really have a tough time with things. it sucks because it seems like its a lose-lose situation. often they are harassed or bullied or ostracised if they do come out of the closet, but just as often they struggle with emotional and psychological problems if they dont. throw a heavy dose of puberty and hormones into the mix and is it any wonder many of these kids have mental health issues and get involved with drugs and alcohol???
that being said, i hope that my closeted or confused friends in high school knew they could always confide in me and i wouldnt have judged them. im not saying i wish they had told me or i feel hurt that they didnt (frankly, i think that would be a little self centred) im just saying i hope they knew i was there for them. i guess i feel a little guilty because it never even occurred to me that my friends might be struggling with their sexuality. i know that isnt my fault, but i suppose its something of an assumption on my part. i think i just always take people at face value and dont look for more than they are offering.
anyway, to all of you friends of mine who i have been in and out of touch with over the years, i hope you know that i care about all of you and like you just the way you are. whatever your struggles and trials in this life, you have a friend in me.

2 comments:

Kyle Bailey said...

hmmmmm...yeah sexuality in high school is such a freakin mine-field. I think the worst part is the fact that somehow the minority of kids having heterosexual sex becomes 'the norm.' I'm hoping someday the conversations in high school will change from 'oh-mi-god Sally and John hooked up last night' to 'did you hear John and Jeff told each other that they will love each other forever?' and 'oh-mi-god, you haven't ever been close to doing IT? Neither have I.....I guess we're normal after all'........

callie said...

well chloe, i must say this post makes you sound like you don't have friends. and i genuinely forgot about your blog. sorry. i'm back now if you'd like to post something cool about me.