J'Arrive

well comrades, i had a cool experience today, which i have been reflecting on and i thought i might share it with you. today, i had the great fortune of being able to make it to the actual masters swim workout at the y. usually, i have to do the masters swims by myself because i cant make it, but today i did, and there is nothing like having the coach and the teammates and the beautiful boys to round out the swimming experience. anyway, in about the last five minutes of our practice, the little chilluns showed up for their day camp swim which follows masters. they were all sitting by the deck watching us do our sweet thang, and one little girl crept up closer and my lanemate was playfully splashing her ankles, so i splashed him, and it was just one of those nice little moments that we are all lucky enough to have once in a while if we are observant enough to notice them.
the reason is was so cool for me though, is because i remember when i was a kid and my swimming lessons were right after the masters swim. we would be like the little kids i saw today, sitting on the deck, watching the masters being masterful. i yearned so badly to become one of them someday. i wouldnt say it was a goal, so much, because i never really made an effort to become one, but more like an affinity, i suppose. like i knew i was one of them already, i just needed to get older and more practiced at what i was doing. and today, i realised that i have arrived. through no effort or design, i have actually come to inhabit one of the most genuine and steadfast desires of my heart.
too often, i get a little disheartened because i havent achieved many of the things i hoped i would at this point in my life. but i realised today that although we are often victims of the best laid plans of mice and men, sometimes we also get to be champions of unmitigated circumstances. its in these times, i think, that we are happiest, because we are truly being ourselves. there is real sincerity in that. i didnt try to become a masters swimmer, i just am one. it almost sneaked up on me.
the thing that really made this experience so beautiful was the little girl who approached us. i thought to myself, there goes the one like me. the one who wants to be one of us, who hasnt yet realised that she already is.